day 10 - the first.

(full list) - 10 - describe your first love, and your first kiss.

james cameron's 1997 classic, titanic.

oh man. okay, let’s go back to the first boy i ever went “steady” with because i kind of want to relive this story. he was a boy named matt, in middle school… probably around fifth or sixth grade. we held hands in the cafeteria during lunch, he walked me home every day after school… and after about a week, i decided to break up with him. truth was, i had never kissed a boy before – and was scared to have to do it. so, i broke up with him. without giving him a single reason. “just because,” i said. so he followed me home for two more weeks… where i cruelly gave him the cold shoulder, simply because i was too scared to admit that i was a prude. the last day he followed me home, it was pouring… he didn’t have an umbrella and i refused to let him share mine… and he just walked beside me, quietly… in the rain.

he moved away to colorado shortly after that, and i haven’t heard from him since.

my first love on the other hand, is an entirely different story. my first love and first kiss came hand-in-hand. this story is laughable on so many different levels, but i’ll try to keep it as short as i can: his name was john. we met at church. yup, church. i was fifteen, he was eighteen. our/my first kiss came after he took me on our first date, to see a movie all the girls in the world had seen at least a dozen times by then… titanic. (i wish i was making all of this up.) afterwards, he kindly walked me to my door and as i held it open with my heel, he came in for the kiss… and i accepted. we dated for, i dunno — in my mind, it was forever – but it was probably only a few months… i wish i could refer back to my kero kero keroppi diary (again, no joke) so i could give you the exact date of when i was convinced he had broken my heart beyond the point of no repair. as far as i know, he’s married now – with a kid. maybe two.

pure teenage angst aside, from a relationship aspect, it was like most other “first love” stories… an epic fail. but we grow up, we move on… and we love again. and again… and again.