i honestly don’t even know where to begin. for most of our relationship any story i’ve told has been in pictures, so to talk about it in words – isn’t exactly easy. (anyone who has known me longer than 10 years would be laughing right now, but that’s another story.)
in regards to our first meeting, let’s just say his version of the story is a little different than mine, in that he claims i dropped the f-bomb a few more times than i recall, but – i will say right here right now that he’s just flat-out lying. i know this, because we met at my place of work. the short version of the story is: a customer hit on the bartender, and whatever he said or did, worked. but our story isn’t exactly like that. nor is this supposed to be a story about how we met.
we met almost two years ago. we moved in together almost exactly a year ago (no joke, we’re resigning our lease at the end of the month.) evidently in “new york relationship time” — two years is a “long” time to be with someone. for me, two years is just the tip of the iceberg – and i say this after spending 680 days out of 700 (give or take) looking at his face, being in the same room, sleeping in the same bed… day in, day out… yes, you get to find out a whole buncha stuff about that person… but there’s always… always more.
if i had to pick one defining difference between this relationship and all the ones of my past – it would have to be the fact that i have definitely learned to look at myself more. learning how to utilize the whole, “imagine yourself in their shoes” tactic… and lemme tell ya, i ain’t no peach. i’ve learned that i am extremely selfish, that i have a hard time sympathizing with sensitivity and for whatever damn reason, i always think i’m right – which is fine, when you are – but most of the time, i am wrong. which leads me to how apologizing, brings on a whole different set of problems. it’s almost like i have to shove all ten of my bony fingers down my throat to regurgitate two simple words that solves almost every problem: “i’m sorry.” but… and this is a big ‘but’… i also know, i am a good girlfriend.
i am faithful, always have been. i say what i mean and mean what i say. “i love you” isn’t just three words strung together, it isn’t a moment of infatuation that fades away into the night, it’s not something you say to get someone off your back. it’s a promise. a deep-rooted emotion, a pang in the gut… it’s something you say to someone after you thought long and hard about it and realize — there isn’t a goddamn thing in this world you wouldn’t sacrifice for them.
so yea, i love david becker winters.
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